TOM AND JESSE
by Ann3
Summary: Just how did Steve's pay per view bill get so high ??


TOM AND JESSE

Written by Ann Rivers ann.rivers@virgin.net

Completed 26 December 2001

Summary: Just how did Steve's pay per view bill get so high ?

Spoilers: Murder Can Be Contagious - and any similarity between an ever hungry little mouse 

and an ever hungry little intern is purely intentional…

Disclaimer: Diagnosis Murder and its characters belong to CBS and Viacom. 

I'm not making any profit from them here – just having a little fun…

"So, Mark, how's the patient…?" 

Catching his amused look, Amanda grinned ruefully back and raised her hands.

As if she'd had to ask. She'd heard it the second she'd arrived at the house – 

free and hearty laughter, coming through the open patio of Steve's living room.

And that wonderful, infectious laughter spoke for itself.

"Must be caffeine withdrawal…" Mark said at last, gallantly straight faced.

"Must be…" Amanda agreed, hiding her blushes behind a welcome mug of coffee.

Another chorus of giggles and chuckles from downstairs seemed to agree with her, prompting another not quite so pointless question as Mark opened the refrigerator. 

"Mark, what on earth are you feeding him on…? Apart from laughing gas, that is…" 

"Anything I can get my hands on…" came the somewhat muffled, rueful reply.

Handing her a plateful of sandwiches, Mark then laughed and fondly shook his head.

"Now that his fever's broken, our Jesse is having one _serious_ case of the munchies… 

Steve reckons at this rate we're going to have to nail the fridge shut…"

"Knowing Jesse, not even that would stop him…" Amanda observed dryly, 

making room on an already crowded tray for Mark to add the inevitable pot of coffee. "No, I don't suppose it would…" Mark chuckled, adding in fond afterthought,

"I always thought feeding Steve's bottomless pit was a challenge, but Jesse…"

"Yes, I can see that…" Amanda nodded while favouring him with a shrewd smile.

"Just as I can see how much you're enjoying taking care of him…"

"That I am…" Mark grinned back at her while thoughtfully shaking his head. 

"Though it's been so long since I nursemaided Steve, I'm a little out of practice…"

"Really…?" Amanda's eyes widened as they studied the glorious feast before her. "Well, I would never have guessed…"

"Why, thank you… I think…" Mark shot back with a good natured grin – 

one that faded slightly while he studied a now laden, not to mention heavy, tray. 

"Yes, I've definitely forgotten how much food a convalescing boy can get through…"

"I'll stop by a hardware store tomorrow and get you those nails…" Amanda chuckled, 

practical to the last as she took two of the plates back to carry them herself.

Lifting a now much easier load, Mark grinned gratefully back at her and winked.

"Make those industrial strength, Amanda – and lots of them…!"

The continuing hysterics from the floor below were becoming so contagious that Amanda and Mark were starting to laugh too as they headed for the stairs.

"I never realised daytime TV could be so funny…" Amanda sighed, shaking her head.

"Ah, that's because you're thinking of adult daytime TV…" Mark replied with a shrewd grin. 

"One of Steve's pay per view channels is doing a two day phone in comedy request special, 

covering just about every classic to modern day comedy show and movie you can think of, 

from Laurel and Hardy for old kids like me to cartoons for the little kids…"

"Well, that last part must be suiting Jesse down to the ground…" Amanda chuckled – shaking her head as that familiar, irrepressible giggle met them at the foot of the stairs.

"Steve too, it seems…" Mark replied just as dryly, recognising his son's equally distinctive laughter. Placing the tray on a hallway table, he gestured for Amanda to quietly follow him. 

Coming to the still closed doors of Steve's living room, they stood to listen once more –

Mark in knowing amusement, Amanda in growing disbelief at a familiar, unmistakeable theme. 

"They're not…" she said at last, looking up at him - still convinced that she was hearing things.

"They are…" Mark chuckled, shaking his head at the prospect of more cat and mouse mayhem. 

"With what he's just been through, me looking after him and you and Steve fussing over him too, 

I think our Jesse has decided this would be a good time to enjoy his second childhood…" 

"I'm not sure he ever left his first one…" Amanda shot back, laughing now as she added fondly,

"And yes, I know we've all tended to baby him these last few days, but…Tom and _Jerry_…?" 

Laughing too much to answer, Mark just nodded in equally mischievous agreement.

"Well, Amanda, you know what they say…" he sighed, rolling his eyes at another salvo of giggles. 

Retrieving the tray, he then looked back at Amanda and winked. "If you can't beat 'em, join 'em…"

"Yes, why should they have all the fun…?" Amanda agreed, following him into Steve's living room.

"Hey, Mark…! Amanda…!" Jesse's greeting at their arrival was as cheerfully enthusiastic as ever. 

Or maybe that bright smile was for the arrival of all that food, set now on the table in front of him.

Trading that thought in a fondly wry grin, Mark and Amanda took their places on the sofa's armrests, both carrying out their own discreet study of their convalescing patient.

He was still a little pale. Gaunt too – lingering reminders of a call that had been much, _much_ too close.

Or maybe it was Mark's robe, several sizes too large, which made him look so vulnerable within it.

But the blue eyes were clear, bright with life – not to mention tears of laughter.

"Hey, you're just in time…" Jesse went on, nodding happily towards the source of that laughter.

"This one's an absolute classic…!"

"So you've said for everything we've already seen…" Steve retorted with a fondly exasperated grin – casting his father a martyred 'I have no part in this' glance while Jesse glared peevishly back at him.

"Not stopping you from taping them all, is it…?" Jesse shot back, all sweet and wide eyed innocence – shrieking through giggles of protest as Steve took carefully gentle revenge on highly ticklish ribs.

While thoroughly enjoying the entertainment, Mark still felt a little fatherly authority was called for.

"Now boys, if you don't behave I'll send you both to bed without your suppers…" he warned – somehow keeping his own straight as two dismayed faces stared plaintively up at him.

"Yeah, well, he started it…" Jesse muttered, a picture of little brother sufferance.

"And I'm finishing it…" Mark retorted, turning the same mock-stern attention to his smirking son.

"And you – stop tormenting your honorary little brother…"

As that grin predictably vanished, and Jesse's returned, Amanda glanced at Mark and rolled her eyes.

"Who needs Tom and Jerry with these two around…?" she asked dryly.

"Or Yogi and Boo Boo…" Mark chuckled, finding it impossible now not to join in.

"Chip and Dale…" Amanda giggled, deciding it was time for some long overdue payback.

"Stan and Ollie…" Mark shot back, meeting three politely quizzical faces with a sheepish grin.

"Sorry, kids, I guess that's a little bit before your time…"

"Not for some…" Jesse muttered, ensuring his ribs were well protected as he grinned sweetly at Steve.

"Do you want your breakfast in bed tomorrow, Jess…? And I do mean _in_ _bed_…?" Steve asked mildly, prompting a theatrical gulp from Jesse and a 'Why do I bother…?' shake of his head from his father. 

"You know, this is one of my favourites…" Amanda went on, still laughing at the look on Jesse's face – her turn to defend herself against the quizzically amused faces of both detective and doctor. 

"Hey, I have a year old son… what are your excuses…?"

"Wise move, boys…" Mark chuckled as the two combatants just grinned and kept judiciously silent.

With their own antics on temporary hold, they turned their attention back to those on screen.

Tail wrapped around a fiercely grumbling stomach, Jerry was homing in on a workman's lunchbox.

Ripping off its side with his bare hands, he licked his lips in happy anticipation and marched inside – from where came the sound of rapid, highly enthusiastic slurping and munching.

At the same time, Jesse was working his way through a slice of pizza with the same rapt enjoyment – oblivious to the amused nods of agreement that met Steve's quietly wry aside.

"Well, I think we can forget bothering with those nails…"


End file.
